Today is July 12, 2017. Two weeks ago yesterday, I lost my best friend, beloved companion and partner, my husband, my Bob. The last two weeks of his life (June 12-27, 2017) he spent at Taos Retirement Village Medical Center. He walked in there with me, intending to stay 5 days to give me a respite. But Alzheimer's disease had other plans and began intensifying its grip, disabling him more each day. To save money, I briefly considered taking him to a VA-contracted facility in Albuquerque, but am so grateful I decided against that. I wanted to keep him here, as close to home, to Esperanza and the kids, and to our friends as possible. I am so grateful I made that decision.
During those last weeks, he was able to enjoy visits from friends—Donna and Steve, Janice, Rose (who spent the bulk of two different days with him), Kathleen and Genny. Because he was here, he also had visits with Esperanza and the kids who colored pictures for him and gave him hugs and kisses and told him they loved him. And because he was in the nursing center, I was able to focus again on being his wife and best friend. We were able to share quiet evening walks, to attend an opera performance on the Village grounds, to listen to music, and even to dance one more time when a local folk music group performed at the Center. One evening I played the piano and sang for him. While he was still eating, we shared meals at a “table for two.” As he drifted off to sleep at night, I could sit and hold his hand, sometimes I would also sing to him. More than once, we had a whole day of just being together, enjoying each other's company while listening to our favorite CD's. In a very real way, the Nursing Center became “our home” for those two weeks. We were surrounded by love and care, and we were able just to “be” together. We were “at home” with each other to the end.
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