"Hard" is a Relative Term

     So often in the last few months of Bob's life someone commented to me about how hard things must be, and I guess they were.  But they are much harder now.  What made it easier then was that he was here with me; we were sharing each other's struggles and sadness about the effects of Alzheimer's disease on both of us.  And that made a huge difference, still sharing everything.  We also still spent our life together.  Still enjoyed sunsets and moon rises over the mountains, and the walks we took in the park or woods.  We still held hands, still shared our morning coffee, still hugged and kissed every morning and every night.  We could still enjoy time with Esperanza and our grand kids, still laugh together at their antics, and delight in their newfound abilities.  We were still a couple and felt each other's loving presence in so many unspoken ways.  Now, in the absence of sharing, this season is so much harder than all the hard days and nights of his illness.